Fat Diary morphed into 2011

So when I started these life changes, Carly (my trainer) requested that I keep a journal of my thoughts, experiences, and feelings. I was a diligent student for about a month and then I just could not find time to journal. My handwriting is bad and it wasn’t something that I liked doing. I would prefer chatting about my thoughts and feelings than writing about them. But NOW blogging is way easier! It’s kinda like sending that venting text message to everyone in your phone at one time. I can blog about some experiences and be able to chat with so many people at once. Knowing that people are reading this blog motivates me a lot.

So today I thought I would recap the very first page in my Fat Diary (i.e. the journal Carly wanted me to keep).

Fat Diary Page 1

 This page is very nicely titled “things fat people think about”. I always said that being fat was just a way of life. I did not think it was creating any unhappiness for me, at the time. But now I see that I would constantly make adjustments to my daily life to live as a fat person and now I see that I don’t need to do them. Things like booth sizes in restaurants (Chili’s has huge booths, but Northwest Grill is cramped), seatbelts in cars (I couldn’t buckle a Honda Civic seatbelt, but a Tahoe worked well), waiting room seats with arms on the sides, plastic patio furniture nightmare (haha! I have broken so many of those cheap chairs!), inclines in parking lots, stairs. Lord helped me if I needed to tie my shoe in public! I always had to buy extenders for necklaces. I even had to buy the heavy-duty toilet seat! That was probably too far and crossed some line in the world of blogging, but I’m trying to be as honest as possible. haha!!! “Historic” buildings, have small walkways and doorways (shout out to all of my caterers that have worked in the Thomas Center or Hipp and had to go sideways through those doors!). Ok I think I’m getting the point across.

Fat people (yes, I’m going to use the “F” word), make adaptations to their daily life-like someone has lost a limb. Only difference is that they have a choice to change it. I had two legs that worked perfectly fine, but I would not use them to walk up stairs to visit friends that lived on the third floor. AND I had convinced myself that I was perfectly fine in making this decision. It’s hard not to feel silly when I think about some of the life style adaptations I worked into my daily life, just to deal with being fat. I used to always say that stairs made me have to use the restaurant, so that I could go to the bathroom after a flight of stairs. I didn’t have to go, I just wanted a place to pant and catch my breath where people didn’t see me.
One of the most important things I have learned from my new lifestyle is that, very simply put, it’s easier being thinner. It doesn’t make sense to me anymore why I carried around all of that weight for so long. I think I would be too lazy to do that now! Carly had me wear the weighted vest in the gym a while ago and I hated it! It was just 40lbs and I could barely handle carrying around the extra weight. I couldn’t wait to get that vest off, but yet for 29 years of my life I wore a much larger fat vest and thought I was happy to do it.
I’m so happy to have lost my 167 lbs (to date) fat vest and I will fully admit that I’m too lazy to carry that beast around ever again!

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